I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
