I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
