No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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