I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
