I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
