Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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