Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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