He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
