using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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