No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize