omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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