absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
