I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
