she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
