which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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