What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
