like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize