Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
