like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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