Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
