So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I checked into jail on foursquare
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
