At least make sure they are 18
Why
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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