toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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