Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Someone shattered a urinal.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You ruined the universe
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
