let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
what is it with giant penises always finding me
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
