Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We're too hungover to prance.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
