i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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