I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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