Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
