Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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