is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
