You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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