Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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