hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize