I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
