can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
