; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
