my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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