Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
