He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
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