this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
