dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
this will be a night to untag.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
