She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
