you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
