i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
