I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
