The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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