ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
