Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
the room spins SO much faster in panama
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Bang-toberfest begins!!
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
