just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
